Help Me! I Think I'm Becoming Liberal!

That blog post title probably got your attention, huh?

A friend of mine at work the other day playfully said to me, "Mike, by the sound of some of your Facebook posts lately, I think you might be turning into a liberal." My friend, by the way, is quite liberal and got quite a kick out of ribbing me.  

But he may have a point. 

Today has been quite an emotional roller-coaster for what would otherwise be a typical day-off from work, and the issues are mostly theological ones, but they are issues that affect me very deeply; issues that motivate me and inform me of 'who I am'.  

It started with a random post I read on Facebook on my daughter's boyfriend's wall.  His name is Jeff. I enjoy bantering with Jeff.  He's more of an agnostic/quasi-atheist guy, with a great big heart of gold. He has friends of many different religious views, and occasionally he likes to post the random controversial statement or topic point just to sit back and watch the conversational sparks fly on his Facebook wall.   

This morning I saw a post on his wall, directing him to check out a video about "Deconversion".  Naturally I was curious, so I watched the video, and the five subsequent videos, to see what it was about.  Turns out its the personal story of a young man who was radically born-again in high school, was ardently involved in Christian ministry all through his college years, only to begin having a true, gut-wrenching internal struggle with faith, "knowing Jesus", and many other theological/psychological/life-application issues with his Christian beliefs.  The videos ultimately chronicle his turn to or acceptance of atheism/humanism and how he found peace and contentment.  He's come to believe what he was taught in fundamental Christianity is wrong, and not only wrong, but dangerously so, to the point he felt crushing pain at the thought of leading others into a life he felt was damaging and deceitful.

The problem is, I found my self not only commiserating with the young man at times, but actually identifying and empathizing with him at many points.  His journey is not unlike my own; I've just take a different path, and I am still working on refining that path. 

As I watched, I felt admiration, happiness, concern, joy, and sorrow for the young man. I have asked many of the same questions at times in my faith journey.  My road took a different turn than his, but I can see his pain.  I felt conflicted and saddened that the faith I embrace caused this young man so much pain, pain to the point he thinks Christianity is damaging and evil.

This should never be. But sometimes, I know, that's how Christianity is perceived.

Later I read a chapter in a dynamic book I'm reading, entitled "A Year of Biblical Womanhood" about the concept of justice (Its a great book, and I suggest you read the author's blog at rachelheldevans.com to learn more). Justice, she says, has more to do with a lifestyle than a single instance of making something right.

Micah 6:8 says that the Lord wants us to "to seek justice, love mercy, and walk humbly with your God."

Other versions, like the NLT, says to "to do what is right, to love mercy, and to walk humbly with your God.

In this chapter, Rachel (the author) examines what "doing right" in a Biblical sense might mean to a married, rural Tennessee couple trying to "do right". She examined some issued like buying fair trade foods, giving to poor, etc.  Then she was invited by World Vision to go on a trip with other bloggers to Bolivia to see a World Vision project up close and personal.  The women she met down there, women of valor taking care of their families in the face of adversity the likes of which most American's will never know, touched her heart and my heart as I read their stories.  She showed in a small way how the decisions I make, here in the USA, actually do effect the life and livelihood of those in countries where American companies do business.

I was touched in my soul at the thought that I could help make a difference in another person's life in some small way, and I have been recalcitrant to do anything because to do so would affect my lifestyle. (I think my daughters Lindsey and Cameron will choke on their coffee when they read this, because we just talked about this at length at the dinner table last night, and I was on the, shall we say, right side of the discussion.)

I don't often cry when I read books, but I did when I read this chapter. I cried because I saw in Rachel's heart and story a cry for exactly what the Kingdom of God is all about - carrying for the poor and needy, and helping to free the oppressed, wherever we can have influence to do so, no matter how small.

Then, after reading this, I was surprised to see the funeral procession for slain police officer Kevin Tonn pass by me on Greenback Lane in Citrus Heights. To see literally hundreds of police cars, fire trucks, and other emergency equipment pass by in solemn honor to their fallen comrade was moving, to say the least. I do not know Kevin Tonn at all, but I know some who did, and by all accounts he was a fine man and an good police officer.  He died as a servant to his community.

Servant.  The Bible says he who would be greatest in the Kingdom of God should be the servant of all.

I don't know anything about Kevin Tonn's spiritual life, but I see in his service, and in the service of just about every law enforcement officer, shadows of the Kingdom.  I see shadows of the Kingdom values in lives devoted to more that just selfish gain.  I see shadows of Kingdom values in lives given in service to others, and for that service I am grateful.

So, if feeling compassion for a tortured soul struggling with and losing his faith in God, crying for the oppressed and poor in another country struggling to make a living so that I can have a cheap cup of coffee or inexpensive chocolate, and seeing the Kingdom in the service of a fallen police officer moves my "cred" scale a little to the left, then so be it.

I'm convinced more than ever that "the truth" - the answer to life, the universe and everything - lies not at the left or right fringes of life, but in the great middle where we all come together and overlap and agree on the great things of life. On the left and right fringes are found judgement and intolerance. I'd rather search for consensus and peace.

I'm finding that I cannot base my faith on the "correctness" of what I believe.  My faith and my world is always being challenged, and I am always learning new things.  If my faith is overly enmeshed in how correct I think I am about what I believe, then one day when what I believe is challenged and shaken, my faith model will fall apart.

That 'faith model' is not faith. Finding my life meaning and value in how correct what I think I know is, is shaky ground. It's idolatry, making an idol out of how correct I am. I can't let that faith model stand.

I find that my faith should lie only in God.  Jesus revealed to us God's character. I'm learning new things about God's character every day. If I'm trusting only in God and not what I think of God, then each new thing I learn about God grows me instead of shakes me.

I'm growing a little to the left.  I'm finding the soil over there is not as barren as I thought.  In fact, as I mix a little left soil in with my right soil, I'm finding its pretty fertile soil in which to grow.  

I Think It's Time to Change the Water.....

I have a gnawing feeling in my gut today, and I'm pretty sure its not anything I ate.

Pretty sure.

Actually, I'm quite sure. 

My heart and mind has been swarming, recently, with contradictory notions about the Kingdom of God, and how we are supposed to live this counter-cultural revolution that Jesus ushered in some 2000-odd years ago.  

I can't escape the feeling that, for a large part, The Church in America has got it largely wrong.

Or at least, I've had it largely wrong. I guess I can't really speak for anyone else, can I?

And I don't think it's so much about what we teach or believe about Jesus, God, and the Bible that is wrong. 

Its what we do with that teaching.  Its how we live and breathe and exist and put into practice all the things we teach or believe about Jesus, God, and the Bible that has gone so very, very wrong. 

As I sit here in my living room, trying to flesh out the swirling thoughts in my mind, I can hear my wife in the kitchen, cooking.  I hear eggs frying in a pan, and I can smell cinnamon rolls cooking in the oven. One of our cats is snuggled up in a rocking chair across from me. I can hear the occasional car rumbling down the street outside our home.  The clock ticks on the wall. The trees outside move slightly in the occasional breeze. 

Life happens all around. It's the air we breathe - literally.  We see it, but we don't  really see it very well.  We exist in it, and for the most part, walk through it and ignore most of it because it's what we do.  It's how we are conditioned.  It's the way we live.  Its the air we breathe and the water we swim in.  

My desire, though,  is for my fellow brothers and sisters who follow Jesus to begin to see just how dirty the air and water is.

Honestly, I think that's the deep desire of anyone who has decided to follow Jesus. We want to tell others about the truths we've learned. Right?

The problem is, my self wants so badly to scream at everyone I know, grab them by the collar and shake them until they wake up and smell the stinky air and bad water!  I want to slap people and wake them up to the beauty that is the Kingdom of God, and the need to love others as Jesus loved us, and to love God with all our hearts! I want to make people see how important it is to "go the extra mile", and by God, if they don't get it, maybe making them go two extra miles will wake them up to the reality of God's love! 

Of course, if I were to follow the way of my self, most people would think I was a raving lunatic. No one would see the love of God and the sacrificial love of Jesus in someone slapping them around to make them understand a point. No one ever does. 

Sacrificial love doesn't slap people, or scream at them, or try to force them into believing anything. In fact, sacrificial love, the kind of love Jesus calls his followers to display in their lives, doesn't insist on anything for itself. It's all about others. That's the definition of sacrifice.  

Therein, I think, lies a large part of the problem.  For much of the world, "Christianity" has been defined by people who say they follow Jesus, and yet don't actually do the things or live the life that Jesus asks his followers to live.

Look at the kind of life Jesus calls his followers to live in the Sermon on the Mount  in Matthew 5 and 6. Look at some of the hallmarks of that kind of life that Paul writes about in Romans 12, and his definition of love in 1st Corinthians 13. Look at Galatians 5 and read about life lead by the Holy Spirit and the 'fruits of the spirit'. 

We read about these in church.  We learn about them in Sunday school, and study them in our bible study groups. We talk about prayer and fasting and loving our neighbors and loving our enemies, and understand the Kingdom principles behind why Jesus wants us to live this way.  

The problem is, the rest of the world reads Matthew 5 and 6, and Romans 12, 1st Corinthians 13, and Galatians, too. They know what the Bible says.  Most people generally like what the Bible says about love and faith.  They generally like what it says. 

But when they look from the pages of the Bible to the faces of Jesus' followers, all too often I fear the world raises an eyebrow and shakes their collective heads in quizzical dismay, because what they see on the faces and in the lives of Jesus' followers seldom matches up with what the Bible says his followers should look like.

They read about Jesus telling  his followers to love, so the world looks for love.  Too often they don't find it. 

They read about  Jesus telling his followers not to judge, but too often that's exactly what the world finds on the face of Jesus' followers - judgement.

They read about Jesus telling his followers to turn the other cheek, and go the extra mile out of love. Too often the world sees Jesus' followers refusing to out of their way for anyone. 

They read about Jesus telling his followers to be salt and light in the world. to be different from the world so that God's lavish love would be displayed through his followers.  Too often, the world doesn't see any difference between Jesus' followers and anyone else.

They read about Jesus telling his followers to give to those in need, but too often find judgement and callousness instead of fulfilled needs.   

But along with all these indictments, and I'm certain we could all come up with more, there is one that I think is the deepest, most telling indictment of all.  And it's this:

They read about Jesus telling his followers to seek first the Kingdom of God and His righteousness, and to place all our trust in God for life and security.  Instead, they see Jesus' followers, especially in America, placing their trust in the dollar, their jobs, their homes, and their security- just like everyone else. 

If Jesus' followers won't actually trust him, why should anyone else?

What we do and how we live matter, friends.  That's why I have a gnawing in my gut today.  At every point where I wrote "Jesus' followers", I should have written my own name, because I am just as guilty as anyone I'm complaining about.  I am a part of the problem.

But I don't want to be anymore.

I've come to the conclusion that the only way to begin change is to be the change I want to begin.  Yeah, I know, Gandhi said it, and it's quite wise, and I also read it recently in a book, but it's still a beautiful Kingdom principal.  Be the change you want to see.

Change starts with one person, and the only person I can change is me.

I'm the only one that can submit my life to following Jesus and trusting his Calvary love to change me.
I do, however, encourage each of you, dear readers, if this is has touched any chord in your heart, to be the change you want to see in your own life.

I want to see more love, so I'm going to love more.

I want to see more grace, so I'm going to be more gracious.

I want to see more mercy, so I'm going to be more mericful.

I want to see more patience, so I'm going to be more patient.

I want to see less judgement, so I'm going to judge less.

I want to see more of Jesus in the face of his followers, so I'm going to commit myself to following Jesus better, so that my life will display more of the love that I think God wants to display through his followers.

I need to stop rambling now or I will go on forever.

Be the change you want to see.  Often we hear, "if change has to start someplace, why not with you?"

I think the better slogan is, "if change has to start someplace, it can only be with you."

Or me.