Wednesday, September 22, 2010

As Good As It Gets, My Disillusionment is Over

I hit a major milestone this week.  One that I'd been contemplating and ruminating over for several years.  A milestone that, although ignoble in some books, is an important milestone nonetheless.

After a short default hearing on Monday, September 20th, a judge at the Sacramento Superior Court granted my request for a divorce.  A journey that began with starts and stops nearly 12 years ago is finally coming to a close. A long journey of separation, reconciliation, separation again, and finally disillusionment is at it's end.  

As of November 11, 2010, I will be, legally, a single man again.  

Granted, and very very joyfully, that condition will probably not last very long, but, there you have it.   It's finally done. 

I have to give partial credit for the ease of this process to my soon-to-be official x-wife, who trusted me to go through the process uncontested, and not take advantage of her.  I thank her for her trust, and wish her the best in her new life with her boyfriend and likely soon-to-be husband. 

Some folks have greeted my news with gladness, others with concern for my well-being and my emotions.  

One gentleman, after learning I will officially have been married for 12 days shy of 26 years when the divorce is final, greeted me with a smile, a handshake, and congratulations at meeting another "25 year man".

I must say, though, my biggest emotion is relief.  Relief for a thing that is finally done.  Not like a monkey off my back, or a weight off my shoulders, just a serious thing that needed to be taken off my to-do list, and finally has been.  

Seven years of separation left plenty of time to deal with the emotions of a broken marriage.  The mourning is long over, and the healing has long been in process.  This is simply paperwork done, and I'm glad of it.

I am so happy and looking forward to the future.  My relationship with Alene is the most solid and trusting relationship I've ever had.  She's been supportive and very patient with me, and I owe her my heart and soul.   I love her with my very life, and I look forward to a long future together. 

In the words of Jack Nicholson in "As Good As It Gets".... she makes me want to be a better man.  

1 comment:

Emily said...

I wish you and Alene the very, very best. I'm so glad that you and mom have both found happiness with such wonderful people who brighten eveyone's life and make so lovely an addition to our clan.